Battle Lode Runner - Get trapped in holes! Rage uncontrollably before your untimely demise!

Nowadays, everyone has a hard on for online gaming. I admit that it's nice to have especially if you moved away from friends, but there's something about that same-room multi-player experience that just beats all. In fact, I'm sure many of you have had an old-school multiplayer experience whether that would be Toe Jam & Earl or one of the many Bomberman games and I'm sure friendships have been broken because of the highly competitive nature of our hobby. Let's talk about one of the more unusual multiplayer games out there today, shall we?

It's hard to tell, but this guy is f***ed.

Battle Lode Runner was released only in Japan in 1993 for the Turbografx-16 by Hudson Soft. It's part of the classic Lode Runner series originally made by Brøderbund in 1983. Apparently, in the classic video game "Bomberman" for the Nintendo Entertainment System, Bomberman earned the ability to become human at the end of the game and ends up being the lode runner guy! That is why the bad-asses on the cover look so similar to our favorite explosive buddies! All the plot for the game is explained in the 30-second long intro. A black bomberman goes into a rocket, and the white lode runner man sees him escape. I guess it can be assumed that the black bomberman stoles a bunch of gold, because that's what you do in the single player puzzle adventure: collect a bunch of gold.  There's no real plot to talk about, and even the ending is barely an ending at all, you're just treated to an awesome running portrait of the lode runner guy!  But seriously, I wouldn't expect a story out of a game like this and neither should you.

The gameplay is simple yet taxing. You must collect all the gold in the level while avoiding the enemies that chase after you. Your only means of self defense is a laser gun that destroys a block on the floor so the enemy can fall in. You can't attack the enemies directly so you must rely on proper timing to trap your pursuers. You can't jump so if you happen to fall into one of the holes yourself, then you're screwed! It's a "trap or be trapped" game as you rush to find all the gold and then find the exit to escape with your life! There are over 100 levels in the game and you can even create your own, so that's a great little extra for you creative folk. The puzzle levels are all well and good, but it's the multiplayer that I found to be the best part.

Green is raging his balls off right now.

In multiplayer there are 3 modes of play for up to 5 players: Survival, Escape, and Tag Match. Survival is the most straight forward as it's a 5 player free-for-all where everyone runs around stages trying to trap each other in holes with the last one surviving winning the match. Avoiding getting trapped by your friends is actually pretty easy if you keep your wits about you, but eventually some monsters will be let loose into the arena chasing after the players, so that will certainly complicate matters for you! In "Escape", the players aren't after killing each other so much as looking for the ladder that will let them escape the level as monsters are let loose into the arena as well, and if everyone dies then the match is a draw. Then there's the tag match which is only up to 4 players (so there's an even amount of players), and it's your typical 2 vs 2 team battle where you try to trap and kill the opposing the team.

Even though this game was only released in Japan, Hudson soft saw fit to release this on the Wii's virtual console in the United States region. There's no Japanese in it what-so-ever, so this game is easily playable to anyone of any native language. The Lode Runner men have tons of personality in the victory cut-scenes, they remind me of mini-Captain Falcons. Again, if you have the friends then you must check this out, and even if you don't this game is kind enough to have multiplayer A.I bots for you to mess around with which I am always grateful for! Have a good one, everybody.

Bravoman - Punch people in the face from 50 feet away!

As a weird guy, it's only natural for someone like me to be drawn to weird games. Games that are just so crazy, that it will make it a normal person's head hurt just trying to comprehend it all. So when it comes to games like Bravoman, I'm drawn to it like a fat kid on cake. Is this game truly amazing? Not entirely, no, but it trumps many with an absolutely amazing super hero. A hero who makes a shocking return in "Namco X Capcom" and yet hasn't made a single appearance since.

This game was originally released in Japanese arcades in 1988 by Namco. This game is simply too much awesome for America, but they made a Turbografix-16 port in 1990 to be released overseas with a simply amazing English translation. Bravoman is your traditional "tokusatsu"-styled hero among the same veins as the Power Rangers or Kamen Rider. The evil Dr. Bomb is making a horrible "end of the world"-type weapon, and it's up to insurance salesman-turned-superhero Bravoman to save the day! Now why is he called Bravoman? Because he always yells out "BRAVO!" when he attacks! Why does he say "BRAVO!"?  I have no idea.  His powers enable him to punch and kick things from across the screen with stretchable limbs, it's like an action title where you play as Street Fighter's Dhalsim, except you can't set things on fire.

As far as mechanics go, this game is very simple. You simply run to the right of the screen while punching whatever that might get in your way. The controls are a bit wonky for game made in this era, so you really need to learn the limit of your limits quickly if you want to survive later on. At the end of the level you'd run across your sidekick known as "Lottery Man" who is simply a robot with a unicycle, usually saying "Hey Bravoman, want to eat?" and throws a couple onigiri your way. If you're so inclined, you can be a complete dick and punch the living daylights out of Lottery Man much to his own annoyance. Do it enough and he'll just appear in the next stages only to taunt you, but eventually he'll forgive you because that's what bros do, they forgive one another.

Bravoman has a cute little theme that you hear in the first level and in jingle form at the end of each level. Other than that, the music isn't particularly noteworthy as I can't even force myself to remember any of the game's tunes. Graphics aren't much to look at either, but for a 1990 game it was pretty great especially since I was still play NES games during this time! At the very least, Bravoman has a great running animation, he truly looks like he's moving with a purpose.

It's not touched upon much in this blog entry, but this game is seriously bizarre. I'd love to talk all the weird stuff you'd find, but it would actually be a lot funnier if you ran into the hidden jokes by yourself (Try punching the telephone booth!). Your head would probably explode in confusion, or you might end up laughing your ass off like I did. As mentioned before, Bravoman teamed up with fellow obscure videogame heroine Wonder Momo in the game "Namco X Capcom" which was released only in Japan. With a much more updated art style, he still remains goofy-looking badass who can throw a mean punch. If you grew up on modern video games I really wouldn't recommend this title to you, it requires some precision and the gameplay hasn't particularly aged too well. But if you're aching for something truly different, then go ahead and try out Bravoman!